Poly Dating Pt 7.

It's been a minute since I talked about how Sean and I's relationship is going as well as my dating or seeing anyone else.

I jumped back into online dating! Updated my photos and started swiping! And while I'm open to meeting potential new people to date from public encounters, it just doesn't really happen very often. (I've met one of my boyfriends through a friend when I was 19, he's in jail now; pedophile!) So while I am out and about in the world during 2020, it's usually to get shit done or have a doctors appointment and go right home. So I still use online dating! I've gotten some flack for this over the years when people, usually above the age of 35, ask me "How did you two meet?" I assume they want some Hallmark cutesy story, but that just isn't very realistic for my life. We swiped right, chatted, and met at Chipotle. Nothing fancy grandma.

But I did have one date recently! After taking to him for roughly a month (phones calls/ texting), we finally met up for a walk in the park. He's super cute and kind, but isn't interested in me. He had just got out of a relationship and is still working through a bunch in his life... or so he says. I'm never too sure if people can just say "they aren't interested" without feeling like they are hurting peoples feelings or if things really are busy/not ready, you know? I personally feel like he just wasn't that interested but enjoyed texting and having someone to talk to randomly. Everyone likes opening up their phone to nice messages from someone cute. (You can totally find someone physically attractive with out wanting to/ or ready to date them)

This scenario is pretty common in my dating life. It was actually my first date since basically October 2019. (Almost a full year without meeting someone new!) Life was busy, weird, unpredictable and I haven't been meeting people worth my time. Most people of course are still just looking sex these days. Covid has left people exceptionally desperate for physical intimacy it scares me to meet people in person. My most recent sexual assault was in 2019, meeting people who's sole purpose is just to fuck me isn't my style right now. I'm still healing. While I respect the hustle and the desire to fulfill your personal needs, it should never be at the expense of consent.

Sean was excited for me to go on a date with someone new. To get out of the house, flirt and enjoy someone else was nice. He was nervous but happy for me. This year has proven trying on Sean and I'd relationship in many ways though. If you follow my blog you know about my mental health, toxic family, being kicked out of my dad's, Sean needing foot surgery from our less than great anniversary vacation and then moving into an new apartment together by ourselves before he starts school has been one trail after another. But we love our apartment and new privacy together! Things are slowly coming together.

Before we moved into our new apartment while his foot was still healing and he was on bed rest, I decided to put into practice a healthy positive exercise we could do for ourselves. Before we went to bed, we would each name ten things we each loved/admired/noticed about each other, before we went to sleep. We aren't the best, but I try to get it in once a week. They don't have to be big fancy important things we love about each other. Just things we notice. Sean really likes words of affirmations as his love language and I mainly started this for him. I like when he can think about things that aren't obvious or that he doesn't repeat from prior sessions, I like seeing what he can come up with. Compliments feel good, why not do it more often? Here was our most recent session I took brief notes on:

K stands for Kirsten. S for Sean. And each person is saying it to the other person.

1)

K: empathetic

S: sexy

2)

K: simple easy to please

S: like's that you talk forever

3)

K: I like that you like the things I don't like about myself (talking forever) S: like that you're supportive

4)

K: I like that you take criticism well. (I'm a bitch tho...) S: Make appointments for me

5)

K: Good listener S: Make me warm dinner every night when I come home from work.

6)

K: consistent-dependable S: Drive's me when I don't want to

BUNS OF STEEL

7)

K: booty (he has the BUNS!) S: like your left eye fleck

The very difficult to photograph well, eye fleck!

8)

K: I like that we share tv shows together

S: innocent sweet cuddles

9)

K: gentle with me. Not with life in general. you're clumsy.

S: ASS

10)

K: I like that you let me paint your toes

S: You're silly

Simple, sweet and cute! No pressure, just share what makes you smile about each other. Sean and I also have been struggling with our physical and mental health. We both agreed to see our doctors and have both returned to anti depressants together. But being happier isn't as easy as popping some pills. The pills come with complications. As an example, for Sean they change how much he enjoys sex and how functional it is for him. Some psych meds do this to me too. I'm actually hoping for the opposite affect and maybe get some of my sex drive back as *some* depression may be lifted and anti depressants trigger mania for me. We shall seeing the c*ming months. (ha-see what I did there!) This is new to both of us, we never have seen each other on anti depressants. I'ms curious how that will affect our relationship with each other?

Sean also got a hair cut in hopes it helps makes his daily self care a little less intimidating. He cut 16 inches off! He is actually pretty sad about it. He wanted to shave it all off bald and grow it out again, his hair does grow crazy fast. This was a compromise he made for me. It was getting too long and difficult for him to care about and he wasn't taking care of himself like he should. Hopefully this will make it easier through a difficult time and his hair will be long again in no time!

I also got my hair did!

I think that is a decent update of Sean and I, but I know you guys follow this series for the funny screen shots. I have two situations for you. So, here you go....

>>>>>>OH HELL TO THE FUCK NO.<<<<<<<

So, I finally replied.

But than he replies.... instantly.

I looked him up on Facebook him just for funsies, in case perhaps this was a real person with some serious disabilities instead of a scam bot. To my surprise we had mutual friends that I talk to occasionally, so I messaged those friends and asked them how he knew him, attached with these screen shots. One said he was a regular customer to his store, was a little slow, but seemed friendly. And the other said, that was his girlfriends ex boyfriend and to stay the fuck away! And even though he has "90% of his sight" (his words) and can can thoroughly view and enjoy my photos, he refuses to try and read my messages and insists I communicate with him on other platforms. I reported and blocked him because honest it's just creepy and a bit much. I am not censoring his identity at all because I don't think he is a safe person, and things like this should be made public. #StopBeingWeird

And the last laugh for the night?

TRUTH! This one had me rolling. Political options on hinge are as follows: None, Conservative, Moderate, Liberal.