Why I Can't Leave the Mormon Church Alone
- ForgetMeNaught
- Mar 6, 2021
- 7 min read
This little meme is literally makes it so easily to understand the answer to the question so many still active mormons ask.
I equate the level of belief and activity in your cult is directly related to the life crisis the person will experience once they leave. Indeed "the pain I endured for coming to truth and righteousness was mighty", that was me trying to say how heart wrenching, suicidal and PTSD inducing leaving the Mormon cult was for me, but in a "Scripture-esk" way.
One could say " Kirsten wept." (mocking of the shortest scripture in the bible when "Jesus wept" for his dead friend Lazarus.)
Or like dear ole' Enos, previously one of my favorite Book of Garbage stories... "Behold, my soul hungered. And I cried in mighty prayer and supplication for mine own soul."
Of course no one in a cult actively admits they are in one. They don't admit it until they leave. Instead the rationalize that all religions are cults, and therefor it my point is "moot". But I agree, all religions are cults but that doesn't make Mormons sound any better. Some cults are certainly worse than others. And Mormonism ranks pretty high up there. Gratefully, the church is dying.
They don't understand they are in one. I didn't understand I was either. And I considered myself decently educated. I was skeptical and I thought I was thinking for myself. And I was, but within cult programming and indoctrination from youth it's nearly impossible to see outside of that forced learned train-of-thought. That there is an answer for everything, and if their isn't, than that is suppose to be left for "faith", and everything will work out in the end. I no longer touch faith based religions with a 100 foot pole. Stay. Away.
This is essentially where this blog should end, because I answered the question. But it's not where it ending. Not today Karen.
I'd like to tell you a little story. In 2019 a mutual friend made a post about going indoor sky diving! While I knew he was a member of the mormon church because we grew up together, I also knew he owned his own business(es), loved skateboarding and was friends with lots of different people. His circle wasn't exclusively mormon. He was even dating a non mormon. (she converted, and they are married. poor girl!) His post about "a group going to iFly" didn't really speak "mormon" to me off the bat.
But it was.
There was no reply from him after my message of wanting to have an openly religious conversation. He wanted it to be one sided. From there it was difficult to actually get payment to this bishop. I reached out and messaged him. No reply. I reach out to another mutual friend who was on the planning comity about this Young Single Adults Activity. (YSA- is a mormon term for single, non married adults ages 18-35-ish. It's a rather predatory way to control/prep/force these age groups for marriage.)
When I still didn't hear from Chris M., I messaged the stake presidents wife, from my old ward, who I knew well and exercised with weekly at the church gym with dance fitness and zumba for years. (stake is a regional area of members in a geographic ara.
Stake President is an important leadership role given to a man in this regional geographic area. The wife of the stake president is equally important)
I got his personal phone number. Texted him. He read it immediately, and didn't reply. (he needs to turn off that phones function if he doesn't want people to know that he is ignoring them) This is when I noticed his posts on the previous group I was in, disappeared? He blocked me, temporarily, from trying to make payment in advance to him for this event. He was contacted by me (an exmember) two different ways and by two other people.
Deflecting me back to Chris V. *face palm*. GAH! Terrible communication. This man also owns a used car lot. A sketchy one might I add. A previous employee and mutual friend gave his honest review working for him and even buying a junk car from him. Chris Maybry's communication skills are... oof, not great.
Anyways, this event left a sour taste in my mouth but I'm honestly not surprised. Maybe they were stringing me along trying not to get payment from me so that they would fill the spots with other people, likely members? I ended up getting sick and couldn't go anyways but damn. Something they probably were happy for and what they would call a "blessing". What a bunch of bouncing back and forth non sense.
This is my experience being an ex mormon though, they didn't treat me *quite* this poorly before leaving. If you are still mormon reading this blog though, you are likely similar to my aunt. Pictured below is a excerpt conversation of her opinion why people leave the mormon cult. Because people were "offended". This was not the case for me and most of the people I know. However If you want the doctrine reasons why I won't be returning you can find them here in the Dogma section of my blog. (Click here for the blog with the most direct links to many of my studies of the falsehoods of momornism)
So why don't I leave it alone? Because people need to know not to join or continue to live in a shitty cult.
People need to know that Joseph Smith used a rock in a hat to write The Book of Trash mormon. Because people like me weren't originally taught that he did and the church is finally admitting and teaching the truth after it has been proven historically true and made public/viral!
People of the church than gaslight members saying things like:
These teachings have always been taught. Why didn't you seek the truth yourself?
You didn't have enough faith
Most people leave "because they are offended in some way, usually by a person and not doctrine." -Leslie Farthing
Living in an echo chamber feels pretty good, until you realize that there are people inside AND outside of it profiting off you staying mindless. (yey 10% tithing! And Shopping malls being built on temple square by "The Church") The people on top. Church leaders hoarding billions ($120 billion) of investments while you are clueless to their lies. I know I was. And it wasn't what I signed up for at 8 years old to put me on their permanent record, unless I asked to be removed otherwise. And people need the truth. Because if they knew it, the LDS Corporation would fall even quicker than it already is. The Age of Information is killing the Mormon Cult.
I came across this video below. It is roughly 22 minutes long and I don't agree with all his views. Specifically that he (Rio, I believe his name is) believes that the members and leadership of the church intends for good and has good hearts. While I believed that what I was doing when I was mormon, was what "heavenly father" wanted me to do; it included racism, homophobia, islamphobia, transphobia and so much hateful rhetoric. Just because you think you are good or doing good, doesn't mean you are. Being a good person though is inside most LDS members and if they can be educated out of the brainwashing i believe so much good can come from it. That being said he made some excellent points through his video which I will summarize and time stamp for you below.
Side note: Those who read my blog are not typically mormon. So many of these terms and historical incidents you will NOT be familiar with, however, as you learn about different cults, I find it an important to use key words so if you so feel inspired to "google search", it would provide you with the things you seek.
Three Nails in the coffin of leaving The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
[2:30] 1) "Books on a Shelf"- Church History, Teachings, Doctrines Practices-
Adam God Theory, Kinder hook plates, seer stone, "Book of Abraham, Polgamy, "blacks and the priesthood." Fanny Alger- a 14 year old maid Joeseph Smith banged in the barn.
[8:15] 2) How "the church" (TSCC- The So Called Church) has acted in the "real world"- How Have they acted socially? How they behave, perform on social issues
Where they progressive on interracial marriage? Ahhh no, they were vulgar and fought against it "not even one drop of negro blood" should be mixed into marriage with white people.
BYU Professors being fired for professing a belief in evolution.
Their stance on Birth control and oral sex- against them both. (sad!)
Civil rights movement. Exra Taff Benson taught that Martin Luther King was inspired by Satan. And believed he was a ploy to bring communism into this country.
Against Gay Marriage and that these are "Real world issues that world is getting wrong."
Homosexuality was a mental illness/ saying masturbation will make you gay.
[12:48] 3) Personally-> How is the church treating you while you are dealing with these things?
Being ostracized. Called an Apostate, and "anti mormon"
Jefree R Holland feeling "furious" towards those who are leaving.
Satan has your heart "doubt comes from Satan, you need to repent."
The notes section in my phone has been full of documents, history, screen shots and personal stories of how the Mormon Cult exists. In the past, present and how it will continue to conduct itself in the future.
From LDS Living blog space {Single Saints} Inner Beauty Is Not Enough (yes you read that filth correctly. Its a tough read)
Purity Culture/Slut Shamming 90's Mormon Purity Video - I watched this crazy video in seminary as a teen.
March 2021- BYU Denouncing its Support in students using Flash lights to "Rainbow the Y"
The list really could go on, but my blog has several resources, links, and proof through out it, these are just some random social/cultural/political things that meant something to me when I came across them!
You may have beat cancer but you want to help others get through their treatment and hardships too.
You may have made it out of a burning house, but you want to have a fire fighter go get anyone left behind and bring water to help put it out!
You may be sober, but you want to help others in addiction. Sometimes those who are in active addiction don't know they are, or don't think they need help. But some are reaching out for that help and there are people who want to be there for them when they are ready!
Just like leaving the mormon cult, there are people who don't know they need help. There are also people who want help and don't know how to get it. My voice is to stand out to those who need it. And be ready for when someone does. And to help prevent others from joining such a psychologically damaging organization by sharing my journey and life as a previous devout member and now ex mormon! So why don't I leave the church alone? Because it's important to me that I don't. Being an exmormon is almost as important to me now as when I didn't know how to be anything but mormon as an active member. It is apart of who I am. And I will continue to share my strory!
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