Happier Than Ever

Wow. It's been a minute.

My depression has consumed me. A lot is going on per usual with no consistent schedule or routine in my life, which has left the doors into my ability to feel happiness... wild open for chaos.

I started this blog a few days before 2021 ended, but than got covid and ever finished/ published it. I wanted to do a "wrap up & reflect" kind of thing; to take the defining and biggest moments and document them in chronological order. Many of these memories already have dedicated blogs/have been mentioned, and I will link their blogs for memory sake.

Indeed this year was harder on me in many ways. For example my blog writing in general decreased, last year I wrote 80 blogs. This year I wrote 27. I counted that's still around 40K words and over 3 hours of reading. I'm still very proud of myself for utilizing my coping skills and creative hobbies. Looking back, given the severity of this (mostly) devastating year, I'm surprised there weren't less entries.

Short Re-cap of 2021

• January: Still on Xmas high from my ex's families kindness

• February: Immense vaginal pain, bleached fried my hair lavender, Ended the codependent relationship with a drug addict , catalytic converter on my car was stolen.

• March: Had a D&C for my uterine polyps, Started hormone treatment, Cut off the rest of my ex's hair short. Found out my mom cheated on my dad when they were married.

• April: Continued Pelvic pain, Started Acupuncture, Beach with Sean

• May: More pelvic pain + Physical Therapy with Dr. Emily, Got my Covid vaccine, Broke up with Sean, Got a cute purple wig! Got Waterfall boudoir photography done! Got my car back from being worked on!

• June: Colored my hair orange, BEACH X2, Started new pysch meds, The Blow up, Protective Order

• July: Court to finalize protective order, Sean was evicted, New roommates

• August: Got my nipples pierced! Trip to North Carolina

• September: Shaved with St.Baldricks Foundation, Inkcarceration Music Festival in Ohio with Nick, Evicted Jesse (first roommate) Got Sunset Dreams Boudoir photography done

• October: Stopped all pysch meds

• November: Two impatient hospitalizations, Re-homed Dusk (my cat)

• December: first psychedelic mushroom experience! My therapists dad died, Gave my roommates their 60 day notices, Dog/House sitting in Pasadena for two- weeks while I think about where my future is headed, got covid! *sighs*

Reminiscing the things that I over came this year has felt like a pat on the back. This year was indeed one shitty show after the next. And I got through it. I did have some happy moments for sure. The bliss that has come from several acupuncture appointments while becoming closer friends with Nicholas (my acupuncturist) and trusting him with my health, for starters. My several beach trips. I did some traveling to North Carolina and Ohio. Though my trip to Ohio was not that great. I got sun poisoning. ugh.

I'm now in the process of finding a new place to go and may potentially be moving, permanently, to south Carolina. Of course I have some work to do before that decision is made. I need to check out the opportunity first, so this month, (next week) I will be traveling down for a week and chatting it over. I hope to enjoy some sunshine on the way!

P.s. Covid sucks, lost my sense of smell and taste. Smell is 95% and taste is 90%. I can still get hints of bitter/salty/acidic things, but that's honesty it. As far as the other symptoms go, I had fever and chills pretty badly for 4 days straight. I have officially peaked and believe I am on the mend. All virus's and colds attach my lungs because I am asthmatic though. This is the first time I have been physical sick in over 12 months! I hadn't gotten my booster yet but I'm glad I was vaccinated and hopefully it helped my body fight this better? (hopefully!)

That's all I've got for you today! Peace.